Get your family together to make the best plan for the future before there is a crisis
People 65+ represented 12.4% of the population in the year 2000 but are expected to grow to be 19% of the population by 2030. Whether you are in this age group or someone you love is facing aging issues the best advice is to have a plan before there is a crisis. Get everyone on board with a family meeting.
The internet makes it possible for scattered family members to have a family meeting to plan for the care of someone they love who needs their help. It is also a perfect forum for senior parents in good health to convey their wishes for their future care and aging plan to their children.
A meeting hosted by an elder attorney mediator reviewing the essential elements of a complete elder plan assures that everyone will be heard and all ideas explored. The attorney mediator will make sure that old family disputes and jealousies will not distort the process.
Family members in different states can all join in online without the added expense of travel.
These are just a few of the issues often addressed at a family meeting:
- Residence & Living Arrangements for A Parent: Stay in the family home or is it too isolating or unsafe?
- Driving & Transportation Issues: How do we get Dad to give up the keys.
- Sibling Conflict & Fairness Issues: Is the hometown daughter doing all the work?
- Power of Attorney & Conservatorship Issues Who is allowed to act in the event of incapacity
- Medical & Care Decisions Who makes sensitive decisions when you disagree?
- Inheritance, Will, Trust & Estate Issues Work it out or spend it all in court.
- Distribution of Personal Property Who gets what when parent’s downsize?
- Family Business Disputes Who will run the business if Dad can no longer.
- End of Life Decision-Making Burial. cremation, science?
- Estate Planning Issues for Blended Families What about Mom’s kids from husband # 2
“Virtually every aspect of family planning for the elderly yields an opportunity to reopen old family jealousies and wounds. Not all fights are over money (although most are indirectly). Whether to move your parents out of the house or take away their car keys may also produce a heated argument. Arguments between siblings that live nearby their parents and those that do not are common especially when one wants to be compensated for her efforts. Remember you will always be your parent’s children, never think that role will change in their minds. If these issues cause you to start fighting consider elder mediation.”